I hit 18 weeks last Saturday and the theme of this pregnancy continues: I can’t believe how tired I am. I veer between thinking I probably was just as wiped in my last pregnancy and thinking, I’ve never been this tired in my life. You can tell it’s pretty much always on my mind which probably only serves to make me feel – you guessed it – even more tired.
We hung out with Jess and her kids at National Trust property Tyntesfield last week for the better part of the day and I ended up crashing out on the sofa the moment I got home, going to sleep at 8am and moving at a snail’s pace all of the next day. The same happened after going to the Chinese New Year celebration at Bristol Museum a couple of weekends ago.
I’m accepting that I need to take it easy and plan our days in a way that works for all of us. Thankfully, Laurence has been around quite a bit (the ebb and flow of freelance life), which has made it easier for me to resist pushing through too much.
He’s admitted recently to finding it difficult to connect with the reality that we’re having a baby as he did both times before. I’ve talked about this a bit in my 17 weeks pregnant vlog:
Once we’ve had the second scan next week, I think I’ll feel more prepared to start looking into some of the measures we agreed my help both of us to prepare emotionally like going along to either a Bristol homebirth group or a Positive Birth Movement meeting.
In the meantime, a few practicalities have been sorted. My friend Fritha generously gave me her birth pool and ball as well as some maternity clothes for which I’m so grateful. Not so practical but I’ve bought a couple of fun baby bits (a t-shirt and a cloth nappy) and crocheted a newborn hat. I’ve been trying out my new sewing machine and am looking forward to making some harem pants soon.
A lot more sensibly, we’ve moved the girls into the bigger room that was serving as our guest room. It’s meant we’ve been able to clear space in our room and that’s set me off on a serious decluttering mission. It’s frustrating that I don’t have the energy to do much at a time but gradually the house is feeling far more comfortable. It’s making it possible to imagine a fifth person living here.
I’ve talked about where we are in making mental and physical space for the baby in my 18 weeks pregnant vlog:
My bump has suddenly got a lot bigger and Talitha is giving it lots of attention, asking if the baby can hear us and trying to feel movements. Ophelia seems completely oblivious to any change. In fact, she keeps elbowing or accidentally kicking my bump and demanding that I get in uncomfortable positions at night.
I’ve had to put limits in place with regard to nighttime and she is bit by bit accepting a cuddle from Laurence instead of plastering herself against or on top of me exclusively. I’m definitely in a phase of not loving the bedsharing but it’s still the option that gets us the most sleep at the moment and change is happening. Once we’ve painted and sorted the new guest room, we might look at our sleeping options again.
The “20-week” scan is just a week away, the day after Ophelia’s second birthday. Next week is going to be an exciting week around here!